I'M IN LOVE!

I'm in love and I don't care who knows it! lol.

He makes my heart grow bigger and fuller every day! It's amazing! I never knew that was possible... His point of view and the way he thinks through rough situations really amazes me. I'm kind of jealous!

Yesterday was a really rough day. I asked him if an In-N-Out shake would make him happy and he said "Yes... but you know what would REALLY make me happy?"

His response to my innocent "What's that, baby?" was the sweetest response I've ever heard in my life! Long story short.... I make him happy! Thank goodness! I knew he made me happy and I know that I make him happy, but even in the worst situations and the most stressful times, he still sees me as a blessing in his life! I could not be more grateful!

He's the sweetest guy and he knows exactly how to put his feelings into words.... I'm so jealous!!! All I can ever say back is "You make me so happy! I love you so much!" but that doesn't even begin to describe how I feel about him and how he makes me feel.

I've never met a better man and a more caring father. He's unbelievable. He misses me every time we're not together and lets me know every time his coworkers try to "hook him up" with a young pretty girl, that he doesn't want or need anyone else because I'm everything he's ever wanted! Wow.... I'm someone's dream girl? SWEET! ;-)

Now about the caring father part.... It breaks my heart when he talks about his boy because he misses him so much. I know he wishes he could be there every day to drop him off at school and pick him up, take him places, and hang out with him at home. Even I miss him when he's not with us, and I'm only his daddy's girlfriend! I wish I knew how I could make my man's situation better (everything going on in his life) but the truth is... I have no control over any of it. When work sucks, all I can say is... "I'm sorry, baby." When he misses his boy, "I'm sorry, baby". When he's stressed out beyond belief about money, "I'm sorry, baby." It's not enough... I feel helpless every time he's unhappy but he always makes sure I know that I make everything bearable for him.

I WISH THERE WERE MORE I COULD DO! :(

Weightloss Update!

HELLO!!!!!

Well, I am pretty stoked about today. I weighed in at 182 lbs (if you've been following my blog for a while you'll see that I weight 188lbs in January). Even though I look back now and see that I haven't made that much progress, I'm still super happy! I look better, feel better and weigh less! I have only 12 lbs to go to my goal weight and 17 lbs to go until I reach the weight I weighed in HIGH SCHOOL! Whoa. That's nuts :)

So here I am! Almost happy with what I've got to work with ;-)

I still have a lot of work to do but at least I'm seeing progress (and THAT makes it much easier to keep going)! Life is kind of upside down right now (one day is awesome and the next - not so great) so I don't know if it's stress that's helping me out of the plateau I hit.... but at this point, I welcome it with open arms. If this is the only positive I get out of the crap that happens in life, then so be it!

I need to spend more time working on myself, more time fixing "me" and making myself happy.

AND THIS IS HOW I PLAN TO DO IT:
1) Workout at least 3 times a week
2) Minimize bad food intake and minimize portions
3) Start up Bikram Yoga again
4) Spend more time alone (or with my kitty)

Sometimes....

“Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over.”

• Sometimes things work out the way you wanted them to all along.

• Sometimes two people have to live two completely different lives before life brings them together and blends them perfectly.

• Sometimes you have to be patient to see the beauty in disaster.

• Sometimes you have to take the bad with the good, the hard with the easy, the ugly with the beautiful. But never should the previous overshadow the latter.

• Sometimes you have to go slower than you want to because others aren't ready.

• Sometimes you can't do anything but smile to show how you feel.

• Sometimes you don't have control over a situation, but knowing someone will always be there to catch you when you fall makes it bearable.

• Sometimes life is so perfect you worry about the inevitable downfall.... Don't let this rule your everyday life.

• Sometimes people move in and out of your life to show you how special the ones who stick around really are.

• Sometimes you have to stop and appreciate what you have before you set your sights on something else.

• Sometimes you have to look at other people's lives to realize what you've done with yours isn't so bad (sorry, but it's true). 

• Sometimes words just aren't enough.

• Sometimes I'm so happy I get a rush of energy and want to scream at the top of my lungs!

• Sometimes love rules all.

Birthday Love Letter

My dream for us 

is that we'll always wake up

just a pillow's whisper

away from each other - 

that we'll keep snuggling

on the couch

when we're watching TV

and reaching out to hold hands

when we're walking side by side...

My dream for us

is that we'll always

have ideas and plans

for the what-ifs and somedays

stretching out ahead of us

and that we'll keep growing closer

and discovering new things

to love about each other

Another Year Older

Well, I must admit that even though I am another year older, I never felt "younger" to begin with! I've always been the "responsible type". I've been completely independent for a while now and I won't lie... I feel like I've been on my own for years and years on end!

Why is it that birthdays seem to mean less, or leave less impact, than the birthdays when you were a child? Is it because you grew up so much more between 7yrs old-11yrs old than you will between 21yrs old -25yrs old?

I was lucky enough to get away for the weekend with my man and it was amazing! I swear the more time I spend with him the more I love him! He is so sweet (yeah, he's still very sweet), has such an amazing work ethic (which is nearly impossible to find these days), is an absolutely wonderful dad (which makes me happy for our future together), and he has this subtle way to remind me just how special I am and how lucky he feels to have me. I LOVE THAT! I love that he's not afraid to tell me exactly how he feels and that he makes sure I know I'm the love of his life. I look forward to every minute I can spend with him!

Our future has some great things in store and I'm super excited!

I love you, Handsome!